F E A S T I N G Yesterday was Rich's and my 19th wedding anniversary - - - WOW! It was funny - the night before we were talking about it and I was just about to say, "It seems like it was yesterday", when Rich said, "It all seems like a big blurr." We had a good laugh at our different ways of remembering our special day! I think it's probably a pretty typical male/female difference :) Besides making a nice dinner and giving me some beautiful flowers, he is blessing me with the most wonderful gift this week: A prayer-retreat at the House of Prayer! Since the hours of continuous prayer were upped to 8 per day, it has become possible for us to make a way where I can spend 3-4 hours before the Lord every day this week. I can't tell you HOW MUCH this means to me!!! I am getting unraveled/melting away in his sweet, tender presence. Just Him, my Bible and me - undisturbed!!! - in an atmosphere of worship. It is the best thing EVER!!! The last season of my life where I could have this kind of deep and loooong communion with my lover Jesus was before I got married - it's been a looooooooong time! I soooooo long for Him - - - am soooooo hungry for him - - - sooooo desperate just to BE with him!!! BE - not do! It is just amazingly WONDERFUL - because HE IS!!! He is ravishing me with his beauty, washing over me with his presence. I could go on and on. Wish this could last more than a week! The phrase that Jesus said to Martha comes to mind: "...Only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better and it will not be taken away from her." (Luke 10:41-42) For the last 19 years I've been mostly a Martha. Sitting at Jesus' feet and just BEING with him, LISTENING to him without any agenda or time restraint, was a rare occasion in the midst of the busy-ness of raising a family on the mission-field amidst constant change and with tremendous pressures and stresses. Yes, I tried to carve out half an hour or an hour whenever I could, but I was just scratching the surface of communion with him. I'm sure this is the case for the majority of us mothers - - - and that's ok. Our wiping noses, changing diapers and cleaning the toilet, or being taxi for our kids etc are all a beautiful service to him and very worthwhile. BUT - oh - do I ever enjoy this special time with him!!! He is showing me so many things, ministering his amazing love and comfort. I better go now and get breakfast ready for the troops before leaving the house for the day. "My soul will be SATISFIED as with the richest of foods, with singing lips my mouth will praise you. I STAY CLOSE TO YOU; your right hand upholds me." from Ps.63